So I'm kind of done with all the sappy songs for now and I'm getting back into some of my more hardcore stuff. Which is why I'm going back to some Bring Me the Horizon especially because I am probably going to go see them next month with Of Mice & Men in San Francisco! Can't wait!
So this is probably one of their biggest songs Bring Me The Horizon has ever had and it's from their "Suicide Season" album, and it's called "Chelsea Smile". The video for this song was released on August 15, 2008. However it was not officially released as a single until January 19, 2009. Fun fact about this album, it received rather mixed reviews from people who didn't like their change of style from the "Count Your Blessings" album, and when they went to perform songs from this album, they had bottles thrown at them before their set even started.
Okay so now for the lyrics and stuff. You can find them here. Okay so first thing you notice is that he is talking about some secret he has that he won't tell another person which could also mean that he isn't telling anyone what this secret is, at least not directly. Then in this first verse he refers to this secret and how it's actually pretty hard for him to keep it, how it eats away at him, whatever this thing is. And whatever it is is consuming him, he feels like he is just falling. Then we find out that this secret he is keeping could have something to do with a disease he has... have you figured it out yet? If you guessed depression then DING DING DING!!! You're correct!!! Because depression is a mental disease basically that eats away at you slowly, just like he is describing. People tell you to think positively and "count your blessings" but he says he has done that and now he will "count this curse" which is really interesting because really, depression is like a curse. it affects every single aspect of your life.
It makes you hate who you are and regret just about everything, which is why he says "I'm buried and breathing in regret". Then he repeats the secret, because most people who suffer from depression don't want people to know how they're suffering, they try to keep it a secret for several reasons. Sometimes it's because they don't want people to worry or they think people won't care or they are ashamed of the way they feel. And they hide it a lot of the time, just like he says here that he might seem happy but none of it is genuine,
Then it goes into this part where he repeats "repent! repent!" and I think that part is about how some people of religion will try and bring God to someone suffering in this way and some people even say that you suffer from depression because you don't have God. Now, I'm not going to go into religious debate but personally I think that religion is a choice and we all have a right to that choice, so don't be like how he is describing in this song, screaming at everyone to repent, okay?
So then he goes into this little bit about how all of us hide things and feel things that we wish we didn't. We all get a little depressed sometimes. But for the people who suffer from the actual chemical imbalance known as depression, it drags you down and drowns you like he says here. It is overwhelming and consuming and everything seems hopeless. And then he makes another religious comment about how if he doesn't believe in God, why would God believe in him? Again, not going to go into a religious debate. And then he repeats the chorus about his secret.
As someone who has suffered from very severe depression, I believe I know what I am talking about when I say all of this. Yes, depression is different for everyone who has it but the underlying feelings are pretty much the same. Knowing this, trust me when I say it gets better. Sometimes it gets better on its own and sometimes you need a little help. Talking to someone helps, even if its embarassing or you have a hard time trusting people... talking to someone about what you're going through and how you feel, really does wonders as long as you are completely honest. And if that isn't enough, talking to someone about maybe getting on some medication also really helps. Sometimes it really is about your brain and not having enough seratonin or dopamine and having something that will balance out your brain chemistry is really helpful! I know from experience!
Above all, know that you're not alone. That's why I love bands like this and why I love music. Because even when you feel like you are the only person to ever experience what you are experiencing, music shows you that you aren't!
Love to All,
-Autumn the Music Girl
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